Clipped Chapter 4

"Starscream?" Arcee asked as she entered the main control room, seeing said mech sitting on the ground and holding holding his head in his servos. It was very late at night, so why was he up, much less in the control room?

"Oh, Arcee, forgive me," he pleaded in the tone of voice he reserved for when he was being most pathetic.

"Oh, Primus, what did you do?"

"I- I almost contacted Nemesis to give them coordinates!" He said, looking to her and getting to his knees, imploring her to forgive him more. "It was a moment of weakness, but I swear, I'll never be swayed, ever!"

Walking up to him, she glared down at him and placed her servos on her hips. "You said almost, right? Then I guess we can forgive you." She didn't really see the point of him owning up to it if he didn't actually go through with it.

"I had been thinking to appease Megatron, I don't what came over me!"

She scoffed at this. He had chronic backstabbing disorder, that's what. She glanced curiously as he continued his pleading for forgiveness routine.

"You're too kind, you're so merciful!" He said, hurriedly following up with," As it was, I did take down the telecommunications barrier before gaining strength."

"You did what?!"

"I caught myself only a minute later and raised it once again. A minute only, I swear!"

"Do you have any clue how bad that is?!" She asked furiously, taking a threatening step forward. He cringed at her approach and after a few seconds, looked up at her confused. It took a few whirring seconds of her processors for the bot to realize the significance. With an incredulous expression, Arcee said," I'm not going to hit you."

He seemed further confused for nanoseconds before switching to utter praise of how generous she was. Eerie relief flooded him, and the blue autobot felt slight disgust that he expressed she would've beat him (and that he'd given up to it without a second thought) until she remembered why his last attempt to join the autobots failed. Then the disgust redirected to herself and she averted her gaze solemnly.

"Should the decepticons have picked up our base, then we still have five minutes before they attack," he informed her," The procedure for finding autobot headquarters takes ten minutes to execute, but when it is executed, there will be a swarm."

"Then why are you staying here? You're completely unarmed," She asked out of honest curiosity.

"I- I had mind to flee," he admitted," but I wanted you to have fair warning whence they came."

The last part was soft, and it took Arcee by surprise. It came off so honest. Had the con really though to sacrifice himself for his mistake? Narrowing her optics, she accused," You weren't just awaiting your reward?"

His optics widened and he averted his gaze. "The thought had crossed my mind but I'm sick of winning his favor to..." He trailed off and Arcee could hear his plating clatter lightly as he shivered.

"Starscream?"

"It's as sore a topic as Airachnid for you," He snapped quickly. He held his hands in his lap, twiddling his fingers, and finished," So, please, don't pry."

She held his vocalizer silent, if only because he had startled her by bringing up the spider.

"Letting me roam free around the base was possibly the most stupid course of action your leader could choose," Starscream complained in frustration in his predicament. If the decepticons didn't show up, he was still in trouble with the autobots and would probably lose the few rights he maintained these sorrowful days. If they did arrive, then he would be split between whether to assist the autobots or decepticons, with dire consequences for each choice.

"Don't you blame Optimus for his generosity," She snapped. Giving his a rough glare, she added," Even if it was misplaced in affording it to you."

"But, I- I can't help but-"

"Backstab everyone who shows you kindness?"

"Two minutes left," Starscream stated, purposefully keeping his optics out of the autobot's view. They would reveal too much. How much he hurt. This would honestly be one of the only times he'd "backstabbed" someone who was every kind to him. Megatron was anything but nice.

"I'm well aware, I have a chronometer too."

Starscream acknowledged her statement with an idle nod and stayed silent. He didn't see the point in talking, it would only further the trouble he was in with the femme.

"Listen," She said awkwardly," If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always talk to me. I mean, it would keep you out of trouble and..." She obviously wasn't used to making such a personal offer, and Starscream was touched.

"The offer is mutual," Starscream said, hoping she'd take up the suggestion because while he wanted more time with her, he highly doubted he'd ever be comfortable opening up to anyone.

With a bitter laugh, she admitted," Probably won't happen, I don't like to talk about myself much."

"That is also mutual." He especially didn't want to talk of his failures and darkest hours.

Through the strange power of both agreeing they wouldn't want to use the chance to talk, Arcee began," That vile spider tortured my partner and me, tortured us for information we didn't have. Scrap, she tortured me like it was her personal play time from decepticon work and she was just using the 'information' as a construct for the torture..." She cut herself off and covered her optics as they leaked coolent liquid. "But what happened to me, it's nothing. I would endure it a hundred, a thousand, however many times over it took so Tailgate didn't have to be tortured along with. That fragging spider killed him, so... so slowly, and made me watch. Watch his spark fade, his optics dim and life leave painfully. She let him bleed out all the energon he had and pumped in more so he could endure the pain even longer. It lasted... so long. Days, weeks," She gasped and looked to the ex-con as his long, thin fingers wrapped around her shoulders.

He was clearly not used to comforting another, holding her at arms distance, or maybe he was just smarter than to attempt  to get too close and personal. She had pretty much outright stated she didn't feel anything similar for him as he did for her.

She wondered how he'd managed to get to her side so silently, but stopped caring and rested her head against his chest. He gently pulled her to the floor, which she obliged and curled his arms around her now that he had sign she didn't mind closer contact.

"I'm no stranger to torture, either," He confided.

"Why? Because you've tortured so many?"

"I've been on the receiving end far more then the delivering side," he bit back bitterly. His smile echoed the bitterness at her shocked silence.

... How shamelessly he tortured me over and over again?! and her conversation with Ratchet rang through her head and she remembered that just because he'd been a con didn't mean he hadn't been a victim of the decepticons, even if he got himself into the position.

"You've never worked for Megatron before, you don't know how easy it is to disappoint him to a dangerous level. How if he needs a victim to be a guinea pig for his experiments, he'll have no qualms in using the very mechs that worked to create the terrible creation.

The worst part is he'll bring you to within a second of your life, only to have you healed completely so he can do it again. He'll break you so you're dysfunctional and patch you up to put you back on the medical table again, and again..." Starscream shuttered his optics as he stopped himself from continuing that line of thought.

"You... are well aware of the cybonic plague, I assume?" He asked. Hearing the femme hum in an affirmative, he continued," I was one of the creators. He claims he created it, but that is a loose term, as he had twenty bots working on it, including myself. Biological weapons take sacrifices to complete in the first place, diminishing our numbers. We had to watch out fellow peers suffer through it. A terrible, terrible way to go..."

"I know," She murmured," I've seen it in action."

"Have you? How unfortunate. When we finished, there was no cure, and Megatron wanted one immediately. Seeing as we were the only ones to know its genetic makeup and scientists afflicted with a disease are incredibly motivated to find a cure, he infected us all." His air intakes hissed as he shuddered at the memory.

"You were infected with the cybonic plague?" Arcee asked, horror filling her as she remembered vivid memories of Optimus at the virus' mercy.

"Yes, and the only one of my peers to find and use a cure. I held out as they all died, trying to leave behind as much help for the current survivors in the hopes someone would make it out alive. I was the only one. I couldn't come up with the formula fast enough. I couldn't save anybody."

"Oh, Starscream..." She didn't even find herself hating the other right now, overcome with how gruesome his story was.

"It... It was a long time ago," He shrugged off. "Anyways, it was my first step towards power."

"Yeah? How did that work out," She asked sardonically, idly thumbing the decepticon sigil.

"It is well past the time they would've come." Of course they both were well aware of this, but served as a well needed conversation ender; Starscream's composure was slipping and he didn't really like the idea of feeling any more exposed than he already did.

Arcee nodded and broke away from the embrace. "I, um, will forget about this... incident, just this once, but I swear... Should you ever-"

"It won't happen again."

Arcee wanted to believe him, she found herself truly wanting to trust the mech, but simply sighed. "Alright, I'll be recharging. I advise you do the same." She left as a motorcycle and headed to her personal chambers.

Starscream watched her leave, feeling oddly relieved after talking about such sensitive topics, something he typically hated. Looking down at the decepticon shield, he considered maybe changing it. Later, he decided, he'd think about it later. For now, he'd recharge. The ex-con walked to the chambers assigned to him and rested.